Not For the Faint of Heart

(Timing is a bit off because I actually drafted it last week!)

Planning a 50-state road trip is not for the faint of heart.

Let me make that more general: living a life of faith is not for the faint of heart.

Yet there is such irony in that statement! Why? Because it is exactly in the moments when we feel MOST faint in heart that God reveals His presence to us. 

Still. Living a life of faith is an all-consuming adventure filled with near-breakdown moments and times of excitement, but most importantly an overwhelming understanding of God's work in our lives. 

The Road Trip has consumed my life. My time. My thoughts. My actions. My priorities. My money. I think about it when I wake up and when I sleep. Almost every plan/decision I make is weighed against the trip.

This week, that reality was breaking me. My health has not been very good this week. I've been tired and in pain for most of the week. Yet I had so many things on my plate, so I kept pushing through. Yesterday I hit my lowest point. Tears streamed down my face as I lay alone waiting for the acupuncture procedure to finish. I called out to God. As I called out to my Savior, I realized that I didn't need anything in my situation to change...I needed HIM. I cannot do this trip without His presence with me. 

And you know what? Today I feel more at peace than I have for a week. 

All I could think of before was how this journey was taking so much energy and questioning whether it was worth it. Now I realize that it was exactly my "faintness" that drew me into the Presence of the One who called me on this journey in the first place.

Would I really want to live an "easier" life without this calling? No. Life would still be difficult. The only thing I'd be missing was the peace that came from Christ. Hmm. Not worth it!

As you look at your life's challenges and question if you should be where you are, remember that God provides peace far greater than any circumstance I experience. If you are where God has called you, then keep looking to Him for guidance. And if you know God is challenging you to go somewhere that makes you feel "faint of heart," remember that God likely is exactly where God wants you. He will meet you there.

A Crazy Weekend!

The weekend of the garage sale was crazy. I knew it would be hard work, but it far exceeded my expectations on just how much effort it would take.

To start off with I was sick. I've been struggling with various health issues for the past three weeks. By Friday I was exhausted...and ended up in urgent care for a migraine. After the doctor gave me some medicine to at least function, Alyssa and I continued the prep for the garage sale that had been going on all week. (She liked to joke that it looked like we had become horders because everything was piled all over the apartment!) We lugged boxes down the stairs to the car then drove our friend's house where we were having the garage sale. Then we had to unload everything. Alyssa and my friend had an interesting experience with picking up the tables too. Let's just say it took a lot of rope to get them to her house. We were up until midnight.

Our alarms went off at 4:30am the next morning. I felt horrible, so I rested while Alyssa carried the rest of the stuff to the car. I took the first load over while Alyssa went to put up the signs! It was a crazy morning, but the companionship of friends made it worth it!

The morning people didn't buy much. And by 12:30pm we were convinced that nobody else would come, but we decided to pray and wait. We prayed that certain items would be bought and that God would bring people. Less than an hour later we had two customers who both bought quite a few items! People kept trickling in. The items we had prayed to bought disappeared one by one...

Again it slowed down, so we went inside the house to eat some food. Then we decided to it was time to clean up. We walked outside to find people there! And more of the prayed for items disappeared...

We were amazed...and waited a bit. Nobody came, so I started carrying boxes of stuff to the car. One of my friend's neighbors pulled up. She asked how it went. I told her it went pretty well, and to my great surprise, she made a bee-line to the table! What?! As it turned out, she had been eyeing the baseball gear we had. After some browsing, she ended up buying most of the baseball stuff, a puzzle, and a set of drawers!

After that we did pack up--and I went home to rest!!

ALL of the items we prayed for plus some we hadn't were sold! And we made $90. :) Not a bad days work!

The moral of the story: God provides even when the circumstances are less than ideal.

 I ended up being quite sick for a few more days. Yet I had enough energy for the garage sale. The sales didn't pour in at the start, but by the end our prayers had been answered. Not to mention we had AMAZING support from the two people who generously donated as well as from the friend who opened her house for an entire day. I call this a success!

Light in the Darkness

Last night I intended to post this morning...with a different post. And then, well, today happened. Instead of posting the original one I had planned, I decided to write a new one about what is on my heart.

Do you ever look at something in your life and suddenly see it differently? Not because any circumstance had changed, but simply because your eyes shift for a second.

That happened to me at work today. I work in a speech and language clinic so I see kids with disabilities every day. It is not unusual to have to step around a child throwing a fit on the floor or to say hi to a child without a response. "Sensory needs," "low-functioning," and "behavioral lately" are phrases not uncommon to my ears. I see kids "stimming" (another common term around my workplace) off of various things on a regular basis. The kids vary greatly in appearance, not only because of racial differences, but also because of the various "disability looks." Yet I see the children. I love those kids with all of my heart! The moments of connection with child who has autism or a random hug from a child with Down's syndrome or the giggles of delight over bubbles makes the challenging times worth it.

Yet today, after nearly a year there, my heart became saddened by disability. Not because of the children or because of some judgmental reason, but because it's not the way it should be. (PLEASE don't take this the wrong way; I am well aware that these children are blessings and important!) A nearly 2-year-old should not be without any language. Nobody should be stuck repeating a phrase just because her brain won't move past that. No child should be stuck inside their mind with no way of telling us what is going on inside. I want to know these children without the restrictions of disability. There is more in there. There is SOMEONE in there. Someone I cannot fully free. My heart breaks to know that no matter how much love and therapy I can provide, some children will never fully have the ability to use language.

These thoughts come on top of hearing about the ebola outbreak in Liberia and genocide of people in Iraq and the suicide of Robin Williams. There are also a few personal things that scream to me of the brokenness of this world.

So what does this have to do with the Road Trip?

Everything!

This bleakness forces me to remember the WHY behind this trip. The why is because God calls us to be a Light to the darkness through HIS Spirit. If there wasn't darkness there wouldn't be a need for Light. Yet as the darkness thickens around me, I realize just how much I need the One who supplies Hope and Restoration. I am SEEN, LOVED, and HEARD by the GOD OF THE UNIVERSE. How can I not share that incredible news with those facing dark times?!

So this is my why.

This is why I will give up having a home for a year and become nomadic.

This is why I continue to make sacrifices.

This is why I keep believing that God will provide all that is need for this trip.

I pray that the platform I am given through this trip will be an opportunity to bring awareness to things that would otherwise be unknown and hope to those who endure.

Darkness brings the opportunity to share the Hope and Light of Christ in a way that nothing else could.

Where, in the darkness of this world and perhaps your life, have you been given the opportunity to share the Light?

The Perfect Jar

Volunteering is something I've always wanted to do. But I always make excuses for why I can't do it. The Road Trip actually was born out of realizing that I need to make a time in my life to focus on serving. However, I continue to make excuses for volunteering now. So when I had time of in July, I decided it was time to stop making excuse...and actually commit to it!

So Alyssa and I signed up to stuff JoyJars at the JoyFactory of the Jessie Rees Foundation. If you are not familiar with this organization, you should check them out. Their focus is creating joy for children who are battling cancer. (This is a soft spot for me as I have followed many blogs of kids fighting this cruel disease.) Jessie created the concept during her 11-month struggle with brain cancer. She filled jars with fun toys--and made sure they had no air in them to get the maximum amount of joy.

The day we were to go to the JoyFactory, I became extremely nervous. New situations do that to me... I even considered not going. But that seemed silly. It wasn't about me anyway!

We got a little lost on the way there, so we cut the timing way closer than I would have liked. Yet as soon as we found our way to the entrance, we felt so welcomed. They made us feel like such an important part of the process! We watched a short video about the life of Jessie and learned the 'rules' for creating a JoyJar. Then we got to put into practice what we had learned. It's a lot harder than it sounds! No air. Don't show the boring side. Make it filled with love.

Two hours passed in the blink of an eye as we filled jars for kids with various ages. I wish we had gotten a picture to share! It is some of the most fun I have ever had. We left feeling like we were on cloud 9...and are already figuring out the next time we can go. :)

A Logo!!!

You've probably noticed that the look of the blog has changed! That is because we have a new LOGO!!! I love it. And it makes this all feel so official.

Yet the thing that I love best about this logo is that it is a blessing from God.

After a long exhausting day of hosting a garage sale (stay tuned for a post with more details!), I came home to check Facebook. I posted in the 30 Days of Hustle group about the outcome of the Road Trip as I knew they were interested. Then the idea crossed my mind, what if I asked about a logo? I have zero skills in that arena...and a very limited budget...but it would help pull the trip together. So on a whim I posted asking if anyone would be willing to help me with this task.

What happened next was COMPLETELY unexpected by me!

Someone asked what the trip was about. I replied--and gave the blog link.

Then some more people commented with general price ranges. All of which I would consider, but didn't really have a budget for within the Road Trip costs.

The next morning, the first person who commented asked about the trip's route. Of which I could only reply generally since it is still in progress!

Shortly there after I had a message. I opened it. And was greeted by a logo!! NO WAY!

I got super excited!!!! He had to tell me to calm down.

The logo was PERFECT. He had matched it to the blog colors and even started the road in SoCal where the journey shall begin. But the best part is, he did it for a price that I could readily afford.

When I reflect back on this journey, I will always remember Parker Waldrop and the gift he gave this trip.

All that to say...if you need a logo or any printing done, PLEASE check out his site!! He has been incredible to work with and did an amazing job. I have no hesitations in recommending him! *shameless plug*

The link to his page is: Waldrop Services